EQUAL PARTS RHINOCEROTIDAE & ALPHA-METHYLHENETHYLAMINE



Bright Young Things aiming for that dissipated Brahmin heiress look, make note: Kenny Jay Lane chandelier earrings, khol applied in copious amounts, The Kinks LP skipping on your turntable -- all baby steps! Its way important to ingest a lot of pharmaceutical-grade amphetamine (Benzedrine, Dexedrine, and/or Methedrine) and then arabesque on a leather rhino.


Because, for half a century, WASP matrons have decorated degenerate daughter's and son's starter apartments with these charming footstools, made by a small British company called Omersa. Alas, like so many of the finer things in life, it will cost you. Upwards of "One Large" in street vernacular. And remember, its the Greater Depression. (In other words, Daddy's dividends have dwindled.) So... what to do? Ask Mummy to write a bad cheque to "The Man" for the afore-mentioned pharmies. And go in arrears on the rent!


Then, wrap that Balenciaga chinchilla 'round those narrow shoulders and run, don't walk, up Park Avenue in your opaque-stockinged feet. Directly to Scully & Scully; exclusive U.S. distributors of the extensive range of leather animals, just like Miss Sedgwick's.